Do you watch this popular show? I am addicted, I must admit. I find the variety and styles of wedding gowns available now to be very interesting. Back when I got married (the first time) there wasn’t that much choice. Most of the gowns had sleeves and hardly any of them were strapless. Today they all seem to be strapless and hardly any of them have sleeves. You can choose between traditional ball gown, fit & flare, mermaid, A-line, or trumpet. Did I leave anything out?

I still have the photo album of my first wedding. I’m not quite sure why I never tossed it but I didn’t and still haven’t. I guess even though it didn’t end well it was part of my life. I was married to the boy/man for almost seven years.

I even saved the clipping from the Bridal magazine of my dress. In 1973 I said YES to this dress: (the one on the left)

Yikes. What was I thinking? I guess at the time I liked it but it sure wouldn’t be my choice now. All that heavy lace!

I’ve added two more photos of the dress (with me wearing it) so you can see it better.

Here is my dad walking me down the aisle. I look scared, don’t I? I should have been, after all I was getting married at 18! But I must admit, my dad looks dashingly handsome!

And in this closer view you can see the lace. While pretty (I guess) it’s too heavy for the chiffon (or whatever the material was) on the bottom. At least I think so. And that overpowering veil! Ugh! And to think it was the only dress I tried on! I don’t remember how much the dress cost back in 1973, but probably not more than $300? A far cry from the brides today that go in with a $2,000 budget, and that’s the low end.

But back then there wasn’t so much emphasis on getting the right dress. You bought a gown and got married. No big sit-down dinner at the reception: just nibbles, cake, and champagne to toast with. You had to have the special knife to cut the cake with and maybe a cake topper. Most receptions took place in the church hall. Mine did.

Now I’ve heard that in addition to a sit-down-multi-course dinner (which of course is not taking place in the church hall) you’re expected to provide cocktails and snacks before the dinner. Then after the dinner there is something called an “afterglow.” (To me, “afterglow” was what the party after prom was called that my mom did not want to allow me to go to). The “afterglow” is more food. And more drinks. Usually at a different spot than the reception. Some couples even provide breakfast for those out of town guests that are staying in a hotel plus a goodie bag for their room. Enough already!

Your bridal shower was usually held in your home by your mom and not in a “venue.” Bachelor and Bachelorette parties might have been just the guys getting together for a beer——and the girls? Well, I wouldn’t know since I never had a Bachelorette party. Now it’s common to have “destination” Bachelor/Bachelorette parties. You have to go somewhere.

Then you have the popular “destination” weddings. I have a friend who has been invited to a destination wedding. The bride and groom are not even sticking around for a honeymoon! What’s up with that? At least my friends are making a vacation out of it! It’s kind of selfish really to expect guests to fly all the way to an exotic island locale for a wedding unless it’s restricted to immediate family members and everybody can afford the cost. That gets expensive!

So, my first marriage was a largish church wedding with three bridesmaids, a flower girl and ring bearer, with said aforementioned church ex-communicating me seven years later upon my divorce.

Rick and I got married in 1981 in the downstairs of our home in front of a crackling fire in the fireplace. A minister that he grew up with married us with simple vows. I chose a simple ivory dress. Very 80’s, don’t you agree?

Jeez, my hair was so Princess Di! (or is that Farrah Fawcett I am trying to emulate?)

Rick’s parents, my parents, and two good friends who stood up for us were the only guests. My mom baked a cake and my dad decorated it. He even painted the hair on the bride and groom on the cake topper from black to blonde. I think mom made potato salad too or maybe it was macaroni salad?

31 years later and we’re still going strong.

I’m not saying that you shouldn’t have a special kind of day on your wedding day. It’s just my personal opinion that the whole thing has gotten way out of hand as far as how elaborate and expensive they are. Weddings have become an industry instead of a ceremony.

Still, it might have been fun to have such a great choice of gown styles. And guess what? When I Googled the designer of my dress I was pretty surprised to see that they are still in business. Here is the link to Mori Lee Bridal. I didn’t see any dresses that looked like mine though ...

P.S. After doing this blog post I now know why I kept my old wedding album. Just the photos of my dear sweet parents is worth keeping it for.

Love this-brought back memories of my dress,lack of bachelorette party, hair etc.  Thanks for this little piece of nostalgia.

Nancy! Hello! Thanks so much for your comment. Yeah, did you have a bachelorette party? I don’t remember it being done for women. The guys, yeah ... but us? Nope. Times have changed for sure. I’m sure you’ve seen the whole wedding thing with your own children! Me: no kids so I have to lurk on this one with other people whose children are of marriage age.

I’m so glad you are out there reading! Thank you!

Definitely like the 80s dress better!  I agree - not that I have any experience in that area - there are reasons people just elope and go to Vegas!  People like the Kardashians who spend $1 MILLION on a wedding only to have the marriage last what - 7 days? - are out of their mind.  But then I guess they have the money to spend.  When Aaron got married it was such a wonderful, simple wedding - outside under the trees and then a fun dinner and dancing afterwards - they certainly didn’t spend a fortune and it was one of the best weddings I have ever been to! It’s not how much money you spend but the content and thoughtfulness of the ceremony.

Carolyn, exactly! Why spend all that money on “stuff” when the relationship is really why the marriage is happening in the first place. Or is it really for some people? You don’t have to spend a lot of money to make a wedding meaningful. Try telling that to the bridezillas of today!

Wasn’t I maid of honor for you first wedding? Who were the bridesmaids? I know Minna and Riley were flower girl and ring bearer,right? Great photos that brought back so many memories. I remember going to the church in Poppy’s big blue-finned Cadillac. Did you guys just have another anniversary? I can’t keep track!

Bigsis, yes you were! Other bridesmaids were Diane Senk and Cheryl (Ed’s sister). Yes, Mina was flower girl but the ring bearer was Richard (Cheryl’s son and Ed’s nephew). Riley was just a baby still I think and too young. Well, I stretched the 31 years a bit since our anniversary is not until October!

wow.  19. 
My first time around I had just turned 20.
My own son is now 19…. I can’t even imagine he and his gf getting married, although they talk about it….and as I look at the picture of you and your dad I have to wonder what he was thinking.

Maggie, no—- 18. Fresh out of high school! I don’t know what Dad was thinking but I don’t remember my parents trying to talk me out of getting married so young. I guess those times were different. Kids of today don’t seem as mature as we were at the same age somehow. Now it’s pretty common for children to live with their parents well in to their 20’s where then it was unheard of.

Enjoyed this post alot.  Brings back some memories.  My wedding was a bit messed up.  2 weeks before our wedding date, Ron was in an explosion at work.  Well, he spent 3 months in the hospital and a month later we were married.  He looked terrible at the time but we were just so thankful he made it.  (He only had a 1% chance of survival.)  We had to do the receiving line sitting down.  A little awkward hugging people when they are standing up!  LOL…  Anyway…I think you looked pretty in both weddings…and the cake is way cool too!

Debra, oh my goodness! How awful for you! Yikes, a 1% chance of survival. wow.  I am so sorry to hear that! I’m so glad things worked out for both of you. I would like to meet your husband. He must be something else to survive against the odds. Good for him!  Please tell me you might be able to be up at your cabin the first two weeks of June when we will be there. Come for dinner!

Your Father looks very handsome and you look so pretty in your bridal gown on your Father’s arm.  I must say I just love the simplicity of your wedding to Rick.

Joyce, I have to say that I liked the simplicity of my wedding to Rick as well. It was just right. We still have the vows recorded somewhere on our old reel-to-reel tape. It would be fun to listen to them again.